Learning to Share & Explore

So, my first day at teaching at the University went smashingly well - yay! :)
Of course, I had a few advantages. The university is on a bit of a strange schedule, so "summer" courses start the mark of a new academic year. Considering I teach Written & Oral Communication I, all of my students were new, and add it that the class meets at 8:00 and I realized that I was their first experience in a college classroom.

They are soooooo young - they're babies! They are all right of high school, and abuzz with energy and enthusiasm. I'm sure this will subside as the workload increases and the novelty of it all begins to dull, however, for the moment, they're fantastic and I think it's going to be a great group.

Tomorrow will be the test of my organizational capabilities. I have to teach at the university from 8-9 and then at the college from 10-12 and 6-10 - oy vey. The kicker is turning around to be back at it at 8:00 Wednesday morning. However, no time to panic - time to just enjoy the glow of a great first day...

Oh, my. So, reviewing my list for the week it would appear I haven't been that productive, but damn it, sometimes just looking at the "facts" doesn't convey truth. Actually, I've been managing to get quite a bit done - I've made progress prepping for the stinkin' MA exam, I'm hammering out my syllabus for the new course today after many hours with a wonderful colleague who basically handed over her whole course (same course I'm teaching) for my use, am half-way done grading my first set of student papers for my other two classes, and am almost caught up on my laundry!!!! OH! I also had the wonderful experience of being a proud mama.
My girl goes to a local summer camp, and they just presented their "Mock Rock" yesterday. Abby was pretty closed-mouthed about what to expect; all I really knew was that she needed to have a black shirt under a white shirt, and she told me they were going to do a dance routine to "Kung Fu Panda". Okay, so we went shopping for the required attire, and I showed up expecting her to be "dancing panda 10" or something of the sort. Nope! They did the funniest routine to "Kung-Fu Fighting" - ha! - and my little one was THE "Kung-Fu" fighter. I'm sooooo not the best descriptive writer - so you'll have to use your imagination, however, I'll provide a sketch. She came out, the only girl of a group of 6, wearing her black pants and white shirt to the song "Kung-Fu Fighting" - they're all doin' some groovy dance moves, doin' cool hand-shakes with each other, when all of a sudden, Abby takes her white shirt off over her head and, wearing all black, gives a very musical kung-fu kick and disappears. At this point I'm wondering is she'll ever come back - also thinking that's kind of a rip off - she was only out there for three seconds - probably because she's the only girl....THEN....she re-emerges, and as each boy tries to come up to her (all in step to the music) she does another ninja move - now all in black - oh my!!!! The audience roared with laughter and I couldn't have been more proud - proud because she was out there just as confident as she could be - no fear. Perhaps I should take a minute and learn from my daughter - time to go into this exam/new job/life with confidence....

What would you like to accomplish this week?

Complete my syllabus for the new class I'm teaching, that starts Monday, get loads of reading done for the stinkin' MA exam, get some decent sleep, grade all of the papers for my other two classes...oh ya, try to remember to have some fun with my girl, and most importantly, remain somewhat sane.

Yup, that's all...:)

I've never been a quitter - seems, however, that I forgot I had this space and am glad to re-start. This past winter/spring was sooooo chaotic I had to take time to remember where I was supposed to be, and once there, what exactly I was supposed to be doing. However, I think I'm getting a grip and have all kinds of new challenges (yes, challenges, that's a positive way of looking at it) ahead, so maybe I can post something besides venting about how tired I am!!!

I just got hired by another local university to teach a class this summer. I'll still be teaching at the college where I've been for six years, but am soooooo geeked about getting the chance to teach in a completely different environment. The college I teach for now is an "alternative" college; in other words, open enrollment. The open enrollment is fantastic in many ways - it allows many who would never think about college, simply because they didn't realize it was an option, to get an education and, hopefully, a better job. The college boasts that they place 98% of their graduates into careers. Now, I could argue that number, and explain how it's so high, but will save that for another day. My point is that I teach to a wide variety of students and that is one of the things I love about my job. When you have such a wide variety of perspectives it truly opens up avenues for discussion you just can't expect in a "traditional" college classroom. In one class I had 2 men who had spent more time in jail than not, a 50-something year old woman who was coming to college for the first time after the death of her husband, a couple of 40-something men who were coming to college to find a new career field after having their jobs "out-sourced", a 40-something, mostly Chinese speaking man, who endeared me to him with his hard work and love of education, and, of course, your "usual" 18-19 year olds. It is the reason I continue - you truly feel like you're making a difference....BUT....wow it will be cool to see how the "other half" lives.

The university I'll start with this summer is one of the top ten engineering universities in the country. 90% of their student body is from outside of the county, with a relatively large percentage being from outside the country. Also, for the most part, the student body is "traditional"; 18-19 year olds from a middle-upper income level family. Another hurdle to cross is the reality that my subject area, English/Communications, is the lowest priority for the university and the students. Basically, my course will be a course they must take, but probably won't be top on their list of challenges. What I'm looking forward to is the autonomy. Where I presently teach that term is not in their vocabulary, and from what I understand from a friend who already is teaching at the engineering university, once you are hired and have your class, it is your class. That will be new...and exciting...and a bit scary! Oh! The pay is triple what I'm currently making - woohoo!!!!

So, what makes this change scary? Well, of course, my old friend "fear of failure" is rearing it's ugly head, also I'm taking it on when my plate was already pretty full! I'm teaching two other classes and I'm prepping for this damn MA exam - I'll save that rant for another day, but holy shit, I need more hours to my day!!! However, I know myself, and know I'm better when I'm busy...I'm just hoping that I'm not taking that concept too far this summer. As of now, I just realized, I won't know what time off means until the winter holidays - that's a pretty startling realization.

In an effort to end on a positive note, I could be busy having to work three jobs just to make ends meet. I'm lucky enough to get to do what I love, I have a beautiful eight-year-old girl-child, and even though the exam process sux hard, and graduate school made me often question my sanity, it also facilitated my meeting and friend-ing bodhibound, who I get to have as a study-buddy through this exam process, so c'mon, I get a degree, a new sister in solidarity, and a new lease on life...rock on.

Anxiety strikes again - I am waaaaaaay too wound up to sleep, although I know that would be the appropriate action for me to take, so figure maybe if I just vent into the abyss for a moment I can breathe...and hopefully, relax. I realized today that I have five days until I will be in front of new classes...and I've done nothing, really, really, nothing to prepare. I spent the past week trying to fill myself with some sort of confidence to present a paper at my university's graduate research fair. Odd - I truly don't get anxiety ridden when I teach anymore - not that I don't experience any anxiety when I meet new groups of students, but let's just say, I sleep without problems the night before. I'm not sure, exactly, why I was so nervous. I don't really think it's a fear of public speaking as much as fear of the quality of my work. I wasn't ever thrilled with the final draft (if there is such a thing as a final draft) and I think that my lack of confidence in that area spilled over (not surprisingly) into my becoming much more of a mass of quivering nerves at the prospect of presenting it then I had expected. The good news, however, is that I didn't throw up, cry, or pass out, so woohoo.
Must take a moment here to add that I had the pleasure of presenting on the same panel as bodhibound (thanks to her ingenious charm) and was thrilled to get to have a chance to see her present - she was fantastic - not only was her paper intriguing and full of new avenues for interesting exploration, but she was a superb speaker - engaging and comfortable in front of her audience - bravo!
Sooooo, I'm glad to have gotten my first, semi-"real" conference under my belt...however, reality hit today and I'm simply feeling behind...again...and for no good reason, and that pisses me off.
Not only do I have 4 more syllabi to create (I did get one written out today - must put it into some kind of typed-up, logical order tomorrow morning for submission tomorrow afternoon) but I have to read, read, read my ass off as I'm teaching a number of texts I've never read!!! Add to that the reality that visiting my university's campus for the first time since December brought home of that dread fucking exam in August...which I can not, not, not fail...and my head starts to spin....arrrggghhh.....
I know it will be fine - I will get my work done. I've been kicking myself all evening for taking the afternoon to meet some friends from the campus where I teach ("the ladies who lunch") because I have tooooooo much to do, but ya know what, fuck it. It will get done, it will get done....
Okay - enough of this scattered display of my even more scattered mind.....

What is your favorite movie that was released in the 1980s?

Seems I can't choose just one! What can I say? I'm a child of the eighties...

For the record - I checked the release date of Caddyshack - 1980 - woohoo - it counts!!!!

Caddyshack

Eddie Murphy Raw

Winter classes are done, done, done...very happy camper am I. Even though the weather  doesn't seem very "springy", the overall feeling I have is one of renewal, so I'll take it! This past term was rough - I don't really know why. For the first time in two and a half years I didn't have to commute to take graduate courses in the evening, so I really thought this term would be a smooth one, and in many ways, I suppose, it was. I only had two preps (3 composition courses and one communications course) both of which I've taught many time before, so I wasn't in unchartered territory - and it wasn't that I felt soooooo overworked - I simply felt a bit like a machine. I knew what I had to do, so I went in, taught my lessons, graded my papers and the only challenge was making sure the papers for my interactive class made it to the other campus on time - and maybe that's just it - dare I say it...it may have been too easy - too mechanical. One of the joys of teaching (for me) is the challenge of putting together a course that flows - that works - that is challenging and yet engaging - and part of that is the novelty of teaching different courses. The students always change, and that's refreshing - but this term has taught me that I need to keep changing - even if it just means one or two different assignments. I have to work within the college's framework, but there's always room to make it new.
The good (?) news is that I have four preps starting in two weeks. I'm teaching two communications courses (one of which I've never taught) and two literature courses -woohoo. I've taught both of the lit. courses before, but it's been awhile and I'm excited to deal with lit. as opposed to composition for a bit - not only will because of the "new" factor, but also because the number of papers I'll have to correct will be about half of what I do when teaching composition courses. ;)
Also, obviously, it's the "coming down" feeling of having completed my graduate coursework. I simply haven't had the adrenaline rush that accompanies being a full-time student. I've felt a bit like a slug when it comes to my work - my own academic interests/needs. However, the big, awful exam is in August, so it's time to get off my arse and get something accomplished - otherwise, it'll be July and I'll be trying to figure out how to read/know/be ready to write about hundreds of texts I have yet to read!

What was the #1 song on the radio when you were born?

How fun was this?!? I really, really need to finish doing grades, but oh what a pleasant diversion this "hunt" provided. So, for everyone's enjoyment I offer the number one song from March 2-16, 1974....

Terry Jacks - Seasons In The Sun

I've been thinking lately that the continual election coverage may be contributing to my increasingly angst-y mood...then I stumbled across this gem from the beautiful mind of Jim Henson and once again I laughed!! :)

If you could take any class you wanted for one semester, what would you study?

Art history. My sister's undergraduate degree is actually in Art History and I've always been secretly envious - I appreciate art with my limited knowledge; I adore museums - artwork produces emotion - the awe - the wonder. I've always thought that maybe "studying" it would result in it somehow losing some of it's mystery/power - however, that's simply my ability to rationalize why I've never taken the time to truly learn the history behind the pieces. It's never too late...